Lucinda and the Golf Tournament

You would be surprised how many of my clients come to me seeking help. Perhaps they are motivated by a combination of guilt and shame. Ultimately, it hardly matters. They all arrive at my door with trembling hands, confessions at the ready, and, most important, a willingness and need to accept consequences for their actions.

This morning, before breakfast, I received an email from Lucinda Godwin, who is 41 years old. The message came in at 05:39, timestamped from an iPhone, reeking of desperation and embarrassment. I recognized the tone immediately: a woman caught between the fading embers of her self-respect and the cold, blue flame of marital obligation. She has been recommended by a previous client, one who left my office with wobbly legs but, as she later reported, a renewed sense of purpose.

Lucinda’s email is not lengthy, but it is revealing. She tells me, in a voice half-drunk with self-loathing, that she has entered the Brentwood Charity Golf Tournament, “despite never having completed a round without cheating on the scorecard, or, for that matter, giving up after the tenth hole and retreating to the clubhouse bar.” Her husband, Greg, is a senior partner at a law firm, where Lucinda claims the ability to drive a ball straight is a more valuable skill than reciting Blackstone. He and the other partners have a wager once a year where they bet on their wives in the tournament. It is a fun wager, with the winnings going to the winner's favorite charity. But it is also about male pride and ego. Greg has paid over five thousand dollars in fees, private lessons, gym lessons with a personal trainer, and ‘incidentals’ (her word), and now, with tournament day looming, he has made it clear that failure to do well will be an unpardonable embarrassment.